The Pros and Cons of Perfectionism

Mood: Pensive
Music: Gavin DeGraw

Tonight I had the opportunity to have one of those wonderful heart-to-hearts with a close friend that we often find ourselves too busy to enjoy. With all the interpersonal foibles and follies that we commit, sometimes it's nice to know that you were able to say the right thing at the right time and that it actually helped someone and encouraged them. This conversation made me think, and tonight's post is the result.

To so many, perfectionism is an evil word. It can inspire jealousy, disdain, and feelings of inadequacy in others. It has been maligned as an unhealthy affliction by most who are not perfectionists and even some that are. And it can be--if followed in the wrong spirit. Perfectionists can be self-deprecating individuals who push themselves to the point of exhaustion, anxiety, illness, and low self-esteem. They tend to beat themselves up when they don't reach their goals. This is a particularly bad situation because the honest perfectionist can admit that they rarely, if ever, reach those goals of perfection; in other words, the strict perfectionist is doomed to failure on an almost constant basis.

However, perfectionism has its perks. It pushes people to be their very best, to never give up, and to never be satisfied with mediocrity. The perfectionist looks for opportunities to improve in every situation and they are comfortable with introspection (even if at a somewhat irrational level). If we never aim for perfection, it is guaranteed that we will never obtain it. Moreover, we will probably only reach a level that pales in comparison. In other words, we often miss the greatness that we could achieve.

The dilemma is how to make perfectionism work in our favor without all the undesirable side-effects. Here is my philosophy: Aim for perfection, strive to reach it, all the while realizing that you might not make it. If you reach your goals, wonderful. If not, don't stress about it too much. Whatever the result, maintain an attitude of humility (how dare we act haughty towards others when we so often miss our own goals?!?). Learn to celebrate the small victories rather than lamenting that we fall short of perfection. Aiming for perfection constantly is more important than reaching it occasionally. Even Jesus himself commanded, "Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect." (Matt. 5:48) So many people see that verse and think, "Yeah right! Like that's gonna happen." And they leave it there, completely missing the point! Jesus knew that it was impossible for a human to be perfect in their own power. He doesn't expect that. What He does expect is that we aim for perfection, allowing God to make up the difference. He is honored by our desires and our efforts; He has room to work in such a heart. All of this is easier said than done, I know. But that's the aim. To all my fellow perfectionists out there, know that you are loved, you are capable, you are worthy, and I believe in you! Remember, gold is refined in the fire. Furthermore, diamonds are refined by extreme heat and pressure. :)

Dad's Birthday!

Mood: nostalgic
Music: Blessed Union of Souls

Last night, to celebrate Dad's birthday, Kyle and I took Mom and Dad out to dinner at Palomino. Talk about yummy--roasted wild mushrooms over spinach w/ toasted walnuts, potatoes gorgonzola, yummy pastas, pots de creme, and pecan crepe! It was nice to go out to dinner to celebrate--last year we just grabbed a quick lunch to celebrate. The year before that we were up in Alexandria, and then the four years prior I was always at the Autumn Immunology Conference in Chicago (which was this weekend, I believe). I always LOVED going to the Immunology Conference each year, and now that I don't go anymore I miss it when that weekend comes around. :(

Kyle and I went to the lab this afternoon after church to cut yet ANOTHER bridge prep. With all the ivorine dust in the air, I'm beginning to feel like a desert. My eyes just kill after spending a few hours in there--it looks like I've been crying hardcore. But I'm much better now, thank you for asking. :) Now I think I will settle down with a fascinating journal article on the mechanics of tooth movement. Kudos to Dr. Van De Merwe for wonderful preparation.

Brooke Facts of the Day: I have a beautiful younger sister named Ashley who is a freshman at Indiana Wesleyan University as a nursing major. She is the kind of amazing friend that only a sister can be. Also, anyone who knows me knows that I'm married to a wonderful guy named Kyle who spoils me rotten. We're heading toward our 3rd wedding anniversary. We're known around the dental school as "that married couple." Oh yeah, and I have an adorable goldfish named Piddle who LOVES to eat!

Beginnings

Mood: Cheerful
Music: Starbuck's "Baby It's Cold Outside"

It is my opinion that blogs are a wonderful way to stay updated in the lives of your friends and to learn more about how they view the world. Therefore, I hope to update this journal regularly, as the demands of dental school allow. My first few posts will contain small sections about me, broken up into chunks so I don't bludgeon you to death with one long dissertation. :)

First off, I started life in a small town called Bedford. I was born to two very sacrificial Christian parents who raised me with the mandate that I would go to college--no ifs, ands, or buts. I am actually the first person in my extended family to earn a Bachelor's degree, and now I'm on my way to becoming a Doctor of Dental Surgery (D.D.S.). Even though dental school can be rather trying, deep down, I love the fact that I'm living out a calling on my life that I've had since sixth grade to become an orthodontist and short-term dental missionary. I love orthodontics because of the ability to give a sense of self-esteem to others and effectively change the rest of their life--I know, I've been there. I love missions because I would love to see every person come to a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ. My career path and my ministry passions mix well because there is a strong need for dental professionals in the 3rd world. I feel extremely lucky to be a part of this plan and look to the future with anticipation.